Wedding Themes

(Picture taken from http://media.animegalleries.net/albums/userpics/152498/fire%20bird.jpg?=123)
(Picture taken from http://www.pricelesspixs.net/odds%20and%20ends/Mexican%20Bird%20of%20Paradise-after4.jpg)
I was reading up on wedding info from a magazine in Bed, Bath, and Beyond. I saw this gorgeous "peacock passion" themed display as a reception table centerpiece and I thought, I'd like something like that at my wedding. I had already considered having red and gold colors and maybe something Broadway themed.
But then I got to thinking about floral arrangements. I love Mexican Birds of Paradise - by far my favorite flower. And then I considered the phoenix. Pretty sweet right? Maybe I could redesign that peacock display as a phoenix centerpiece...

Family Judgments

My parents and I got together today, mostly to discuss my move coming up, when it came up about my father's plan to win the Megabucks Lottery. I know, everyone and their mother wants to win the lottery (something my Papa has made quite clear to my father). But my dad's got this plan to get the family together in one big plot of land and start up businesses and donate to the ministry. Fantastic ideas, I think.

Then things got judgmental.

My dad made a mention of who's the most spiritual in our family. And I thought, why does that matter? We can't judge people based on their spirituality. Their strength in the Lord should be celebrated, yes, but why put down everyone else who doesn't measure up in our family? I have an aunt who's a Mormon. That religion kind of made my father say, I don't want her in our family group.

What? C'mon, really? Just because of her religion? How arrogant. Not to mention, that line of thinking is what makes people hate Christians so much (i.e. the Crusades anyone?). Then he mentioned that the real reason he didn't want her in our family establishment was because she'd hurt my mom. Again, kind of a dumb reason. Bright side was my mom said she's moved past all that with my aunt so my father said that if we did hit the Megabucks, then he would certainly allow her to live in our group. Another thing that bothered me about this, however, was my dad's always held that against my aunt.

Come again? Really? You've been married to my mother for 20 years and you haven't let it go that she and my aunt had kind of a rocky relationship back in their teens / young adult life? I guess I understand a bit; experiences like that color your perspective of people. But I can't imagine holding something like that against someone for so long. Though he did mention it wasn't a burning hatred, just something that kind of stayed with him and irked him.

Sigh. Can't choose your family, but you can learn from them. And if you can't figure out how to love them, try harder.

With love and God's blessings,
EPD

Identity: Prologue...?

We all live in a world that is constantly torn asunder by two spiritual forces. To put them plainly, they are good and evil. To name them correctly, they are the Creator of the universe, the Savior of mankind, and the Spirit of counseling versus the Ruler of the air, the Killer, Thief, Destroyer, and his lackeys.

Yeah, I'm talking the Lord and Satan.

Satan's got better things to do than attack me personally, and since he's not omnipresent like the Lord, he sends his lackeys for me. Several come at me on and off. There's Self-Doubt, Sexual Immorality, Depression, Apathy, Bitterness, and Discouragement. All of them are liars, just like their master.

Recently I was battling Sexual Immorality in the form of Idle Thoughts, Masturbation, and Pornography. A good friend of mine shared her story with me and hooked me into settingcaptivesfree.com. The program's free, online, and lasts 60 days, a good number since supposedly it takes 40 days to break a habit and 20 to form a new one. More on that later

Even before this rampant streak of Sexual Deviousness, I was struggling with Identity. I didn't know me and I often isolated myself from others because I didn't think I was worthy of friends. I thought I should fade into the background. I figured I didn't matter in the grand scheme of things -which while that is true, I'll get more into that later too- and I shouldn't have to find myself in my friends. So I switched cliques frequently.

But I had one friend, a best friend, someone I loved like a sister.

But I screwed everything up.

It's a shame so many people think Sexual Immorality and Identity tie together so well. As humans, we are constantly searching, forever curious. You see, there's this satisfaction we need to find somewhere, but we have no idea where or even what we're looking for. So we have sex. We drink. We do drugs. We change our personality or our look to fit in.

We lose our Identity. We don't know ourselves, but we're too afraid to know who we are. So we hide, use, abuse, break, build, create, lose, and gain. But for what? We're too afraid to look beneath the surface. Humans have a knack for rationalizing everything. Maybe it's something inherent; maybe it's learned. Either way, we know what's wrong and what's right; we know truth. But we don't want to admit that we know what we know because knowledge is power. True, raw power like that ironically comes with consequences unknown. And if there's one more thing humans do well, it's fear what we don't know or perhaps what we can't understand.

So we do what we do without thinking. If we stop to think, everything we know and do is a lie. And we know this all too well. All the better to coast through life using and abusing and hoping to just get by. But we refuse to acknowledge why.

Humans are mystery even to themselves. All the easier for demons to get in.

*May be edited/deleted

CHG Lost in Las Vegas Book Review

Preview as Listed on Back Cover:

{Mix six teenage girls and one '60s fashion icon (retired, of course) in an old Victorian-era boarding home. Add boys and dating, a little high-school angst, and throw in a Kate Spade bag or two...and you've got the Carter House Girls, Melody Carlson's new chick lit series for young adults!}

In a whirlwind, DJ accepts "lonely" Taylor's invitation to join her mom's tour in Las Vegas during Christmas break. DJ soon discovers that the unsupervised Taylor is focused on one thing only - partying with a capital "P". She's invited Eliza too, and DJ is quickly overwhelmed by the behavior of the wild duo. Desperate, she calls on Casey for help and prays for a miracle before Taylor self-destructs.

The Story (SPOILERS!):

Before everyone dips out for Christmas break -where DJ is stuck with her grandmother since she's not going to be her stepmom's built in babysitter during the holidays- the girls get ready for the Winter Ball. As most teenage girls do, the Carter House girls have their respective dates ask them and shop for the perfect dresses. DJ and Connor end up going together as friends, but DJ shoots Haley an email to let her know that, just so she's aware of this from DJ herself.

DJ finds the perfect red dress, Rhiannon makes the most fantastic green mismatch patterned dress, Casey dawns a Madonna, punk rock look, Eliza has a white princess gown, Kriti stays true to her Indian heritage in a belly dance styled dress, and Taylor breaks the suggested Winter Ball dress code of red, green, or white, and wears black. The guys have rented a suite in the hotel where the dance will be held and a party is likely to ensue. Of course, the Fearsome Foursome (Bradford, Rhiannon, DJ, and Connor) aren't interested and a funny little bit of justice in the form of vomit in the rented Hummer limo dampers the drunks' moods. Anyways, the dance is fabulous for the foursome and the drinkers don't slink home till later that evening/earlier that morning, of course with immense hangovers.

Finals come and go and winter break is on for the girls and the rest of the students. Eliza is heading back to her southern home state until she and her parents dip out to Paris, Kriti's going back to New York to meet with some relatives from India, Casey's going home to California, Rhiannon's heading up north to stay with her aunt and her mother -who's been released from rehab under her aunt's care- and Taylor is touring with her famous jazz singer of a mother Eva Perez. Connor is going up to Montana for some intense snowboarding, so DJ is stuck in town with her grandmother and General Harding.

About midway through the break, DJ gets a call from Taylor, asking her to come stay with her and her mother in Vegas. DJ gets permission from Mrs. Carter to go, but snow storms keep her stuck in the airport for another day. Finally getting into Vegas, DJ is directed to the penthouse suite of the Mandalay Bay where she meet Mrs. Eva Perez, Taylor's mother. She's delighted that DJ has decided to join them for Christmas and she hopes that DJ will be a good influence on Taylor.

Not wanting to be Taylor's babysitter, but wanting to be a good friend, DJ finds it difficult for a happy medium when Taylor's always drinking or flirting with guys at their cabana. (There's cabanas in Vegas?) Aside from that, Taylor, in a moment of weakness, invited Eliza for a couple of days, when she was afraid DJ wouldn't show. Now the party duo are constantly clubbing and drinking. DJ finds that all of this is too much for her and desperately tries to reschedule her return flight date. The airport can only manage to get her home a couple days after Christmas.

Luckily, Eliza is only staying in Vegas for a couple of days. However, after Eliza leaves the club she and Taylor were frequenting for her red eye flight, DJ gets Taylor kicked out of the club after she's been drinking herself silly alone, something DJ doesn't want to escalate into anything dangerous. Taylor doesn't seem to remember this, though she does sleep through half the next day.

After accidentally winning a slots game for $500, DJ decides to spend the money on Christmas gifts for Taylor and her mother. She buys Taylor a glass-blown clown figurine, Mrs. Perez a beautiful glass blown bowl, both of them Christmas cards, and a bouquet of poinsettias delivered to the suite. That evening -Christmas Eve- the girls see Mrs. Perez's show especially done for Christmas. But of course, Taylor spoils the evening by dragging DJ to the Gin Rummy club and gives DJ fake I.D. as a Christmas present. After more drinking and a God send fire alarm, DJ gets Taylor back to their suite in one piece only about an hour after entering the club.

Christmas morning, DJ goes for a swim at their cabana and meets a rather handsome guy at the

pool reading his Bible. He introduces himself as Terrence. The two exchange numbers, and DJ is hopeful at meeting a new Christian friend in Vegas. Upon DJ's return to the suite, she and Mrs. Perez have a bit of a chat, revealing that Mrs. Perez is well aware of Taylor's drinking habits.

Taylor finally wakes from her hangover slump, but she accuses DJ of being a bad friend because she didn't cover for her in front of her mother. Later that evening, Taylor wants to go clubbing yet again, but DJ reaches breaking point and just cries while silently praying for an intervention.

After laying it out there about Taylor's accusations and her inability to be a good friend herself, DJ demands to know why Taylor does what she does, why she wants to self-destruct. Taylor slinks into the couch and starts talking, something the reader nor DJ expected.

The story starts with Taylor's best friend Jessalyn dying from leukemia at age 12. When her friend died, Taylor felt part of her died too. Taylor's grandmother -a strong Christian woman- insisted Taylor not be angry with God for what happened. But then her grandmother died from a stroke. Her father was lashing out because of his mother's death, and Mrs. Perez was always on tour, so Taylor was alone. Since Jessalyn, Taylor's never been able to make another friend that became that close. There was one girl -Ilsa- who was also close with Jessalyn that makes friends with Taylor over their shared memories of their late friend. Ilsa sets Taylor up with her older friend Brent - Taylor's first date at age 15.

But he rapes her.

Turns out Brent had tried the same thing with Ilsa the year before, but she escaped it somehow. Some friend Ilsa was to set Taylor up without any warning whatsoever. Worse, back at school, Brent told everyone that they'd had sex, that Taylor had wanted it and asked for it. So of course, her reputation as a slut started. Ilsa stopped being friends with Taylor and treated her like garbage.

A bit overwhelmed and not sure how to proceed, DJ calls up Terrence. The three of them meet up and Terrence recommends a rehab clinic in L.A. to Taylor. DJ is stunned and not sure if this is some kind of cult set up. However, DJ becomes a bit more at ease when she realizes how much Taylor wants to go through with this. The two say goodbye to Terrence after getting the details, and return to the suite to tell Mrs. Perez what's happening.

Taylor begs DJ to come with her to see her into the rehab center. The two go on Mrs. Perez's tour bus, Taylor walks into the building, and DJ sobs as the bus pulls her away back to Vegas. The Lord has answered her prayers to help Taylor; now DJ can only hope this clinic is what it claims to be, and not some cult thing.

Personal Reflections and Opinions:

AHHH! Yay yay yay yay! I'm psyched for Taylor to go into rehab and I hope upon hope that it sticks. DJ is a fantastic friend for continuing to push past Taylor's emotional walls to establish an insanely deep connection.

Side note, the back preview is a tad misleading. I'm pretty sure the publisher/editor/whoever meant to say that DJ would call on Rhiannon for help, since Casey wasn't much help whenever she called. In fact Casey had her own problems to deal with back home with her parents constantly arguing over Christmas.

Anyways, this book was criticized for being inaccurate, but I can't say I care that much. The point was the story, the friendship between Taylor and DJ, and the intervention of the Lord. Names of places are interchangeable; God's not.

When Taylor said she was raped, I had to set the book down. The phrase resonated in my heart and I cried. I had no idea that was coming. I had considered it, but I figured that would be a result of Taylor's self-destruction through her clubbing and drinking. And the fact that her friend set her up for it was infuriating. What a horrible thing to do! Then treating Taylor like the slut reputation she'd unnecessarily gained? Ugh! Now I think it's all coming together. Taylor acts that way because she figures after her previous experience that it wouldn't matter what she did, she'd still get pegged with that rep. Wow.

I hope that after rehab, Taylor and her mother can repair their relationship. Her mother obviously cares about Taylor, but she's a bit like Mrs. Carter - unsure of how to handle anything this serious.

Man, this story is coming together crazy well and I need to get my hands on the last three books of the series. The next book, first chapter preview leads me to hope for what I've been asking for the past five books-

KRITI! DJ makes a comment about how the girls should reach out to her more so... here's to hoping!

God Bless and Happy Reading,

EPD

New Series Ideas...?

(Picture taken from http://www.fashion-conscience.com/media/catalog/product)

I think I was inspired by the Spirit to write something very personal in an exaggerated, fictional, spiritual setting.

My life.

There were three books at first, but I think it would make more sense to write four. The first is my life up to now, where I am with the Lord, my identity in Him, my journey through the Setting Captives Free website, my relationships, etc.

The next one would be inspired by my engagement relationship, which I assume won't come to fruition for quite some time. The temptations in dating, the learning process, the counseling, etc.

Book three would be our marriage over the years. The struggles, the fights, not feeling love for each other, the good times, and especially the bad.

The last book would be about our children. How we decide to raise them, what paths they take, their struggles for independence, and stubbornness to ignore our advice.

The running theme for all four in the series would be temptation. I was thinking of personifying temptation, as that seems more relatable, but it also gives you a person to hate, instead of looking out for where temptation hits in real life. The first demon is identity, the second is premarital sex, the third is stress and doubt, the last is the fight for our children's souls.

The spiritual battles take place in more of a physical place than they do in the mind (though it could be argued that the physical place is in fact symbolic for the mental battlefield).

We'll see what happens. If it is inspired by the Lord, then I guess it's good to go. As of yet, I'm not very confident in my writing for a legitimate series after what happened with the others.

Hopefully more to come.

God Bless, and Happy Sunday :)

EPD

Firm

Today was fantastic. I went swimming, I saw Inception again, and I got to hang out with my friends. Then I started isolating myself - as I usually do when I am around people for too long -and stopped talking so I could drift away into my thoughts.

It was dark. I have an affinity for darkness, a part of me that is so fascinated with evil, with a villain that is diabolical. I grin when I think of such a character and suddenly twisted seems beautiful. In my mind, anyways. I'm sure in reality if I met such a person, I'd be terrified.

But go figure that when I started to smile at these thoughts of chaos...

you added me on Facebook.

Your name doesn't terrify me anymore so much as it surprised me today. We've made amends, and I made you a stupid promise, one I didn't realize I wouldn't be able to keep. So I know why you added me - you wanted me to have an access to you, an open door, just in case you wanted to drop me a line. Or you wanted us to rekindle our friendship.

But we can't. I denied your request. Accepting it would've only over-excited you, then the reality of things would disappoint you. We can't be friends, not even online. Why bother? We're still too entwined, too over-ecstatic to see a reply or an update. It would only end up the way it did before.

I will fail you. Over. And over. You will hate me, and I almost wish you did now. Having you hate me would be cathartic because I knew the way our relationship turned out was my fault. At least this way we live separate lives. If we became friends again, our relationship would only fall back on what it was before. You was said that I called our friendship impure - that's because it was. I loved you in a way I shouldn't have. I loved you for the wrong reasons. Being friends with you again will only bring all of that back.

While I have let go of what happened to us in the past, I can't forget it. We can't move past it. Sure, that's not who I am now, but I can't go back to it and assume I'm better than it. Sure, you've changed; you're undoubtedly stronger now.

But my love for you was twisted. And I can't disentangle those thoughts from new ones. I'm sorry.

*Subject to deletion

CHG Viva Vermont Book Review

Preview as Listed on the Back Cover:

{Mix six teenage girls and one '60s fashion icon (retired, of course) in an old Victorian-era boarding home. Add boys and dating, a little high-school angst, and throw in a Kate Spade bag or two...and you've got the Carter House Girls, Melody Carlson's new chick lit series for young adults!}

Winter is coming, and Mrs. Carter treats the girls to a weekend trip to General Harding's luxurious Vermont ski lodge. Naturally, she has no idea that Taylor has invited some guys to follow them - boys who have a different type of adventure in mind.

As usual, Mrs. Carter does not pay close attention to the girls' activities. When a dinner outing and small accident keep he away overnight, DJ, Eliza, Taylor, Kriti, Rhiannon, and Casey are quickly in over their heads. As a party gets completely out of hand, only God's help can get the Carter House girls out of this gigantic mess.

The Story (Spoiler Alert!):

Book four starts with Eliza being bitter about DJ winning homecoming queen. Eliza's that girl who insults you while being falsely sweet - a give and take style of rudeness. Anyways, this mean streak carries over in the fashion show, where although DJ is the only girl to make one run on the catwalk, she follows after Eliza. DJ, still injured but now walking with a cane and walking boot, crosses Eliza midway down the run when Eliza kicks DJ's cane from under her. DJ does a volleyball roll off the stage and crashes into several audience members. Taylor is furious about Eliza's actions, confronts her on stage, then slaps her. The two get into it until the girls manage to pull them apart. Mrs. Carter, emcee of the fashion show, is appalled, but recovers with her usual grace. Taylor brings DJ back to the runway and escorts her to complete her run.

After the fashion show, Eliza -probably with her parents' persuasion- apologizes to the Carter House for her rude display. Amends sort of made, General Harding -a good friend of Mrs. Carter's- announces that he'd like to invite the girls up to his ski resort in Vermont for the weekend in the near future.

October nears an end as the idea to throw a Halloween party at the Carter House is proposed then acted on. The girls are each to invite eight friends to the non-alcoholic costume party where Rhiannon and Casey will be using their creativity to give the Halloween party a typical ghostly graveyard theme. During this party, DJ notices that Connor has brought Haley along, the two now officially a couple since DJ and Connor's break up. Some time later, Connor approaches DJ, saying that he still likes her and that he misses her, but he doesn't want to hurt Haley. DJ doesn't want to hear it and blows him off, giving him no solution to the situation he's brought up.

The next day at the pool after school, DJ notices the girls from the swim team huddled around a crying Haley. DJ is irritated by their dirty looks, but she ignores it since she didn't do anything to deserve it. After her physical swim therapy, Connor calls DJ and mentions that he broke up with Haley earlier in the day. The two go out to eat and decide to remain just friends since they don't want anything like that vague near-sex scene to happen again.

Of course, girls are catty and ridiculous, so before DJ makes an attempt to talk to Haley about the break-up, Haley's friends on the swim team rag on DJ in the swim locker room as a "boyfriend stealer", "hypocrite", and "poison", as Bethany -the tough girl on the team- brands her. DJ decides that although she's being honest about her and Connor's platonic relationship, she's not going to bother trying to explain anything to them since they obviously don't want to listen.

As she leaves the locker room, the swim coach approaches DJ with an offer to join the swim team. DJ weighs the idea carefully, since she enjoys swimming, but doesn't want to incur the wrath of Haley's psychotic swim team friends. The coach points out that even as a recovering exercise, she's faster than some of the girls on the team, and it would keep her in shape for soccer in the season to come. Since she's been practicing so often anyways, he figures he could just bring her onto the team without much of a problem. So DJ decides to go for it and hopes to straighten things out with Haley.

Obviously, Haley's friends are not thrilled with this idea. Although DJ genuinely tries to play nice and listen to their instruction -since she hasn't swum competitively for years- Bethany and the other girls constantly put her down. In fact, as a "sign of solidarity for Haley", they all decide to boycott DJ at afternoon practices and wake up for early morning practices. This is a stupid idea, since it leaves DJ pretty much alone with the coach -aside from some of the swim guys who are a way bigger help than the girls were anyways- to improve her times.

Then Conner and DJ go out to eat only to run into Haley, Bethany, and Amy who don't listen to anything the two have to say to explain their friendship and hurl more insults. Yawn. (Sorry, I'll hold my opinions a little more closely to me until the personal reflection section.) More drama goes down at a school football game with more immature battering by Bethany "Bruiser".

Later that week is DJ's first swim meet where she pretty much blasts the competition out of the water (haha, pun). The only person DJ is second to is Haley. After the meet, a couple of girls are fed up with the drama and congratulate DJ, mentioning that waking up early for practice is ridiculous and they'll be back for afternoon practices.

Some more drama with Bethany and almost a beat down later, DJ leaves the meet with Taylor and Casey to go shopping for their upcoming ski trip at the general's cabin. After spending some time in the malls, DJ takes a break while Casey and Taylor hit up a couple more stores. While alone, DJ gets an anonymous hateful text message, which she suspects is from Bethany. After telling the girls, Taylor advises DJ to ignore them and they'll stop.

But they don't. Thirty-seven anonymous texts later, DJ is unsure what to do. As she and Connor talk it over, Connor mentions that Haley has an obsessive personality - OCD over controlling even the tiniest details in her life, even diagnosing her as an anorexic.

Later that evening, Taylor tells DJ that the general will be driving the girls up to his cabin in his fancy motor home on Friday after school. DJ says she can't go since she's got a swim meet after, but organizes a ride with Connor, since he and several other guys have been invited up to Harry's cabin in the same area.

DJ's been doing so well in swim that she's been set up in another relay team in the girls who have started talking to her again. At the meet, the relay team beats Haley's and their high school wins the entire meet - a first for their season. Immediately after, DJ takes off with Connor to ride up to Vermont.

However, just halfway through their ride up their, Connor's pickup breaks down, and the two hitchhike to the nearest town. Connor meets up with the local mechanic who says he can have the truck fixed up by nine that morning. DJ and Connor end up renting a room for the night from the woman who runs the bar in town. One bed and an overly awkward conversation later, DJ and Connor share the bed, but they prohibit any funny business.

The next morning the truck is up and running and the two complete their drive up to the general's cabin. The two meet up with the some of the other Carter girls and Harry's friends as they go boarding on the mountains. DJ confesses to Taylor that she and Connor had slept in the same bed last night, but Taylor being Taylor, she makes this out to be what it isn't. DJ teaches Rhiannon how to snowboard and when the two take a break at the lodge, they find Casey. Casey tells them she knows who's sending the texts - not Bethany Bruiser but Haley herself.

After dinner, the girls sneak out to meet the guys at the lodge for a party. Connor makes light of the fact that Taylor has told pretty much everyone about his and DJ's exaggerated night sleeping together. Irritated at the partying group, DJ, Connor, Rhiannon, and Bradford leave for the night. In the morning, it's obvious that the drinkers are suffering the consequences and are sleeping in to sleep off their hangovers. The foursome go out snowboarding and the wonder of God's creation in the mountains leads the group to sing worship songs and pray.

When the foursome returns to the cabin due to some bad weather, they engage in a rather enjoyable game day with Mrs. Carter and the general. Then Eliza pops up, saying as a thank-you, she's brought the general a $200 gift certificate to one of the restaurants at the lodge. Mrs. Carter and the general head out, and Eliza and Taylor start planning for a party. In an attempt to increase the party time before the general and Mrs. Carter get back, the two have sabotaged the general's motor home, causing it to break down for the night before a mechanic can come fix it, though no harm is done to the couple.

The party gets out of hand -much like the Halloween party did- and the fearsome foursome decide to split it up. DJ threatens to call the cops, making the partiers run like heck to Harry's cabin where the party will continue. After much clean up and restoration, Taylor heads back to the party, and Eliza comes out of her party crazed stupor, apologizing for it getting out of hand.

With the weekend passed, the general drives the girls back into town where cell phone service is restored as the Carter girls return to home sweet home. DJ gets a frantic call from Connor, explaining that Haley tried to kill herself by downing aspirin and she's in critical condition at the hospital. After getting dropped off at the hospital, DJ and Connor further discuss Haley's condition. DJ breaks into sobs, feeling as though this was all her fault. Connor further depresses her by mentioning that word got out about how he and DJ "slept together".

DJ runs into the bathroom, feeling sick herself, when she encounters Haley's mother. The two discuss Haley's condition, brought on by Haley's need for control and her significant ability to hide her feelings. Connor's told Haley's mom about everything, setting it all straight about his and DJ's platonic relationship, and she doesn't blame DJ, but herself.

Two days later, Haley comes to, and DJ finally gets to talking. They discuss Haley's OCD, her relationship with Connor, her suicide cry for attention, and everything else to wipe the slate clean. Haley seems to be doing better and the two decide to become friends again once Haley is out of the hospital.

Personal Reflections and Opinions:

Geez, what a book. As you could tell, I hated all the drama that went down between Haley's friends and DJ. I've been here, on all sides of it, so I think that's why it bothered me so much. If everyone frickin' communicated like mature adults, it wouldn't have ended with Haley trying to kill herself. As for those girls that finally thought this whole thing was stupid and befriended DJ, I can say I related to them the most.

Casey and Taylor have been getting a tad too close for comfort. Casey was making such progress with the help of DJ and Rhiannon, but Taylor seems to be dragging her into the party scene. And the sex scene. Ugh. Luckily, Casey seems to reconsider everything towards the end of the book.

Kriti has a boyfriend. Yeah, and I don't know who he is. I'm angry at this development. So. Angry. Oh, and since she and Eliza have been crazy buddy buddy, Eliza's dragged her into the drinking scene. Though Kriti didn't much appreciate the massive hangover, so I think she's going to stay clean for the time being.

Connor and DJ being friends is a move I didn't expect and I'm glad it happened. Too much pressure for the both of them. Obviously since it hadn't worked out before, they weren't ready to jump right back into it again, especially after the whole Haley insanity. That would have just been stupid.

Haley was being ridiculous, but I guess you can kind of blame it on her obsessive nature. When Connor called DJ to tell her Haley tried to kill herself, I froze up and got teary eyed. I was DJ in that moment and all I could think about was I should've tried harder to talk to her. As someone who's had friends consider suicide and considered it herself, this situation hit home for me. But then we find out it was really for attention and I was less attached to it. Regardless, Haley realized her mistake, that was she did was dumb, and I was just glad she was alive.

Phew. A lot goes on in these books. I own the next one, but no others past that, so it might be slow going to review six through eight.

Anyways, live life, love God, and don't let anything get you down.
Much love and God Bless,
EPD

Inception Movie Review

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=66TuSJo4dZM

Listed above is the Inception movie trailer via Youtube.

This movie is a bit of a psychological thriller laced in an original heist movie. It's a concept we've all heard of before, but has yet to become cliche - dreams.

DiCaprio plays the lead character Dom Cobb. An extractor, he specializes in extracting secret information from those whose dreams he enters.

The Story (MAJOR Spoilers Ahead!):

The movie starts off with Cobb washed up on the beach and carried to a table where an old man is seated. However, the scene quickly changes to Cobb and his partner Arthur (Joseph Gordon-Leavitt) speaking to Saito (Ken Watanabe) in Japan about the advantages to allowing Cobb to train Saito's mind in the art of defense against extractors like himself. Refusing, Cobb and Arthur continue their original motive - to steal Saito's secrets.

Soon we meet the antagonist of the movie - Mal (Marion Cotillard). Mal plays a bit of a double-agent, reporting to Saito exactly what is going on. Cobb and Arthur have sedated Saito and they are actually in his dreams to steal his secrets.

Failing to do so completely, upon waking, Saito informs the team that they have failed their "audition", not because they didn't come away with his secrets, but because he knew he was dreaming. However, it is quickly discovered that Saito has been dreaming a dream within a dream and is impressed by their deception.

Shortly after the audition, Saito asks, if extraction of an idea from the mind is possible, why not inception - the art of planting an idea in the mind? Arthur adamantly denies the possibility, where Cobb claims the opposite, going so far to say that he has accomplished it before. Saito promises that with one phone call upon completion of this job, Saito can erase the outstanding charges Cobb has from running from that have kept him from his children in America.

Upon accepting, Saito explains that he is the business rival of the dying Maurice Fischer (Pete Postlethwaite); both run energy companies, but Saito fears that if Maurice's son Robert (Cillian Murphy) inherits his father's empire, Saito will be driven out of business. So, Saito wants Cobb and team to plant the thought of splitting his inheritance in Robert Fischer's mind.

Such a job requires a team of specialists. Eames (Tom Hardy) is a forger, someone who can change his identity within a dream. A new architect is necessary, so Cobb asks his father-in-law and former mentor (Michael Caine - as expected from a Christopher Nolan movie ;) ) for someone who is a better architect that Cobb ever was.

So we meet Ariadne (Ellen Page), a college graduate who serves as the audience's guide to understanding more about the dream world. In a Paris bistro, Ariadne and Cobb get to talking about their upcoming job. The architect builds the dreamworld as a maze that the target fills with his subconscious, and subsequently his secrets, often manifesting as a safe. The people seen in the dream are projections of the targets subconscious and just as the body sends white blood cells to attack what seems a threat to the body, the brain uses the projections to seek out the invader in the dream - i.e. Cobb and his team. The more things in the dream are changed by any of them, the more aware the projections become and hone in on the threat. However, the more complex the dream maze, the less likely the projections can find the dreamers.

Pain in the dream world feels as real as physical pain because pain exists in the mind. However, death in the dream results in waking up in the real world. Cobb vehemently warns Ariadne to never use memories as a way to build the dream; it then becomes nearly impossible to pull apart reality from imaginary. Time in the dream passes much slower than the real world - five minutes in the physical becomes an hour in the dream, mostly because the brain can process so much more in a dream. Level building becomes necessary for this particular job - i.e. the dream within a dream within a dream. At each depth, time slows even further.

To distinguish a dream from reality, each dreamer carries a totem, something that only they must touch and carry on them at all times. Cobb's is a top - in a dream, it never loses balance, thus continuously spins, whereas in reality it will eventually stop. Synchronized music is used by the team to time escape from the dream. Such escape -aside from dying in the dream- is accomplished through a "kick".

You know those falling dreams you have from time to time? As soon as your stomach drops and hits the metaphoric floor, you jolt awake. That's a kick. Except these guys do that on purpose in the physical world through tipping over chairs or other creative uses of gravity to jerk the dreamer awake.

With such an unstable idea of using dream within a dream within a dream within a dream, the team has to locate the chemist Yusuf (Dileep Rao) who will leave inner ear functions uninhibited (so the kick can take affect) but will sedate the team so heavily that they will have at least ten hours real time to accomplish inception. As discussed, this magnifies time in each level by an extent. (I think they mentioned on the first level it would take a week dream time, six months for the second level, then ten years on the third. Though this is never brought up again so I'm not sure if it matters that much.)

Speaking of sedation, the team hooks themselves into a machine (hidden in a metal briefcase) via intravenous sedatives. On each level they reproduce this machine then synchronize a kick to bring them out of it.

Ok, back to the main plot. While Ariadne is learning and constructing her levels, she finds out that Mal is Cobb's dead wife. She is also the reason Cobb cannot return to their children in America - Cobb is believed to be the murderer. Because of his inability to let go of her, she materializes in whatever dreams Cobb is in and interferes with his goals. This has something to do with Cobb trying to trap her in his memories and reliving his memories is the only way Cobb can dream. This is also why Cobb can no longer architect dreams himself; if he knows the dream maze, so does Mal.

When the team buys out a first class cabin on a private 747 from Sydney to L.A. (a ten hour flight-just enough time to pull off the inception), they sedate Robert Fischer and go to town on his subconscious - the first manifesting as a city. However, upon arriving, the projections immediately attack. Turns out Fischer has been trained for this type of attack when his subconscious is weakened through dreaming. Saito is injured and when the team tries to put him out of his misery, Cobb explains that if any of them die while they are under this heavy sedative, they won't wake up but will be trapped in limbo, a place of nothingness.

Cobb is the only one of the team who has been to limbo, but as the team goes deeper into Fischer's subconscious, Ariadne realizes they will also go deeper into Cobb's, running the risk of meeting Mal or dying due to the trained, violent nature of the projections. Either way, they're screwed, so the team presses downward to go forward. While driving a van, Yusuf stays on the first level to fight the projections and ready to signal for the kick - playing music, followed shortly by driving off a bridge into the river to initiate the kick. The team kidnaps Fischer on the first level and they go into the dream within a dream.

On the second level (manifested as a hotel), Cobb impersonates Mr. Charles, the man who trained Fischer to raise his defense via the projections in his subconscious. By telling Fischer that he is dreaming, Cobb is able to gain his trust and trick Fischer into delving further into his own subconscious. Arthur stays on the second level to initiate the kick there and fight off the projections as well.

On the final floor (a snow covered mountain fortress), the team's victory may be short lived after the chemist on the first level initiates the music synchronization too soon because he has no where left to go before the projections kill him and the others' dreaming selves in the van. Initiating the kick, Yusuf drives off the side of the bridge, causing zero gravity for Arthur and the dreamers in the second level. Without gravity, there can be no kick, so Arthur orchestrates the elevator in the hotel to shoot like a rocket via bombs then stabilize, creating gravity.

With little time to spare, Cobb orders Ariadne to admit to a shortcut in the dream maze. Hesitant to tell him, as Mal will show up since Cobb would know the route to the safe where they are planting the idea, she gives in and confesses to a series of air ducts that will take the team half the time to get through the fortress. On arrival, Fischer gets through the duct first, Cobb standing by with a sniper rival from a higher plateau. Mal appears and shoots Fischer, Cobb shooting her too late.

The team decides to push on to a fourth level - dream within a dream within a dream within a dream - Cobb's subconscious limbo. Retrieving Fischer from that level will revive him in this one. Ariadne and Cobb dive in, and Cobb reveals some startling information.

Cobb and Mal were trapped in limbo for decades, playing God and building everything that's seen in the fourth level, though now it is decaying after years of being out of it. When Mal and Cobb got bored playing God, they recreated their memories - the reason why recreating memories in a maze dream is dangerous, though it won't make sense just yet. As they approach their destination, Cobb goes into further detail about Mal's death. After returning from limbo, Mal was changed, convinced that the real world was imaginary, and limbo was real.

On their anniversary in a hotel, Mal sat from a window sill several stories above the ground and implored Cobb to jump to her "dream death" with her so they could return to their "real" children. As further incentive to jump, Mal reveals that she has written a letter to her lawyer, explaining that Cobb has threatened to kill her, thus incriminating himself if he did not jump with her. Obviously, he didn't; Mal falls to her death, and Cobb must flee the country and his children so he is not locked up in prison for life.

Finally the two meet up with Mal, who offers to release Fischer if Cobb stays with her. Cobb does not, but instead reveals the reason why he knew inception to be possible.

He was the one that planted the thought that limbo was real and the real world fake as a way to help Mal cope with their situation in limbo.

An idea is viral, he says, repeating what he told Saito at the start of the movie, and it changes the very person who has the idea so that it's all they can think about.

Cobb also says that he could never stay with Mal in his subconscious because even he could never recreate all that Mal was; this Mal was merely a shade.

Meanwhile, on the third level, Saito has died from his injury and is lost to limbo until he can somehow escape. Cobb must sense this because as Araidne throws Fischer over the ledge of the building - creating her own kick to get him back to the third level and finish the job - (I think this happens; a lot goes on as Araidne and Cobb speak, so don't quote me.) he says that he will stay in limbo to find Saito and bring him back to the real world. Araidne jumps over the edge and returns to the third level.

Fischer reaches the thought that the team has implanted, and Eames sets off explosives to destroy the entire infrastructure, creating the kick back to level two. The elevator in level two takes off then shuts down, initiating the next kick into level one. The van hits the river's surface and the team stays in level one until the sedative wears off. Cobb is shown remaining unconscious in the van and Araidne, Eames, Arthur, and Fischer are the only ones shown onshore.

The scene that played out at the start of the movie replays, revealing that the old man was Saito after years of being trapped in limbo. Cobb informs him that this is not the real world, and they need to get home.

Cobb wakes up on the plane and the stewardess says they will be landing in L.A. in twenty minutes. He looks over and sees that Saito is well. Saito returns his glance, then makes that phone call through immigration. Boarding off the plane, Cobb turns in his passport, and he is cleared through security immigration checks without any indication of his criminal record. Cobb meets with his father-in-law and the two return home.

When Cobb gets home, he spins his totem top, but is distracted by his children playing in the yard and rushes to reunite with them.

However, the camera pans back to the top, still spinning on the table before the camera cuts to black.

Personal Opinions and Reflections:

The movie took a typical heist and tweaked it. In a bizarre way, it reflects the extent of crime - stealing an idea is wrong but implanting one (or giving one away) is just as bad. It's a bit of a play on stealing one's inspiration or a jab at plagiarism.

Anyways, the ending of the movie blew me away. If Cobb was indeed dreaming, then this movie took dream within a dream to a sixth level, the fifth being with Saito in limbo then the sixth with his father-in-law and kids. However, it is possible that he was awake, as the top did wobble, but the camera cut to black before the audience can be certain of anything.

I love a good moral/internal/mental battle. The fact that this movie was based mostly on that -the antagonist being Cobb himself- is something I find refreshing and satisfyingly maddening.

I used Wikipedia to refresh my memory and add detail to this review, and while I was reading Wiki, I found a lot of interesting things about the movie. There's a lot of background stuff I'd recommend checking out. The special effects are explained on Wiki also. The whole zero gravity thing had me grinning the whole time. (Have you ever seen a fist fight without gravity? It's intense. Ever wanted to distort your dreams? Get some inspiration from this movie.)

There was some criticism on how rigid the movie was with the rules inside the dreamscape that didn't allow for enough madness. I found the literal, realistic approach fascinating because it makes the movie seem that much more possible. We've all experienced everything that goes on in this movie (minus the actually heist). No one ever remembers the beginning of their dream; we have dreamed within dreams (possibly within more dreams); we've experienced the kick; some of us have had the same shared dreams. Everything that has been explored about dreams and about the subconscious was in this movie (though we know so little). Everything made sense in a realistic way that has me double guessing at my own dreams.

If there is one thing I would critique, it would be that the dialogue sometimes went unheard or too quickly. I'd love to watch this movie again with subtitles because there's a lot I missed, especially when the soundtrack is jacked up to heighten the suspense of the movie. Speaking of, the soundtrack is fantastic. I actually jumped a couple of times, lol.

One other thing is that some things weren't carried over or explained enough. For example the whole time difference in the levels; I don't get why that was so important. Or the totems; the only one we see in action in Cobb's, but I wanted to know what the others' totems did. And how did Cobb and Mal get to limbo the first time? Minor details, but when I like anything enough, I want as much understanding about how it works as I can get.

In conclusion, Inception is going on my list of favorite movies (alongside another Nolan directed movie - The Dark Knight). I highly recommend seeing this movie (though I might recommend seeing it twice, but it is a 2 hour and 40 production so allot your time wisely).

What's on your summer movie list?

Happy Summer, Movie-Goers, and God Bless!
EPD

Edit:

I highly recommend checking out these websites for further information on Inception.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inception_(film) (where most of the info for this blog was verified)
http://screenrant.com/inception-spoilers-discussion-kofi-68330/all/1/ (further detail on what happens in the movie)
http://www.cinemablend.com/new/Inception-Explained-Unraveling-The-Dream-Within-The-Dream-19615.html (a website with a glossary and FAQ for the movie; allows for viewers to leave their own theories on questions raised in the movie; by far the best website I've encountered for Inception)

Convoy of Hope

I just learned something utterly fantastic. Convoy of Hope's headquarters is in Springfield, Missouri. Oh. My. Gosh.

Little known fact, I love the nation of Haiti. I don't know why. I want to go to Haiti, on a mission's trip, really really soon. I wish I had thought fast enough to react after the earthquake hit. But I guess there are still a lot of pieces to pick up. If I could raise the funds to go... God, please. I know this was You, setting me up in the same ZIP CODE as CoH. This is your timing, not mine.

CoH was one of the first reaction teams dispatched to Haiti and they are still there six months after the fact. They are interested in long term recovery, so there is definitely still time for me to get over there and work. God, I want this. I won't know anyone, but I've got You.

Please, Lord. Please, just show me what to do. You know I get into a frenzy and I'm horrible with details. I need You to set the stage, work it all out, and tell me what I need to get done. Even if I have to work like a dog to fundraise.

Time to do more research on my heart's fav nation.

CHG Homecoming Queen Book Review

Preview as Listed on the Back Cover:
{Mix six teenage girls and one '60s fashion icon (retired, of course) in an old Victorian-era boarding home. Add boys and dating, a little high-school angst, and throw in a Kate Spade bag or two...and you've got the Carter House Girls, Melody Carlson's new chick lit series for young adults!}

The Carter House experiences a shake-up as one of its own returns home after an unnerving disappearing act. Then, friction grows as a school homecoming queen race heats up, turning friends and housemates against one another. DJ, Eliza, Taylor, Kriti, Rhiannon, and Casey show they have plenty of lessons to learn as the votes roll in. Some grow smarter and closer to God, while others seem to make the same mistakes over again.

Despite all their differences and disagreements, the Carter House girls continue to grow together, forging a bond that strengthens through hardship. Hearts can change, and friendship paves the way for at least one girl to move closer to God.

The Story (Spoilers!)

Read my first book review here and my second book review here.

Guess who's back? Back again? Yep, Taylor. She just pops into DJ's/her room which cause DJ to throw an onslaught of questions at her. To which Taylor responds, "I'll talk about it more tomorrow." In the morning, everything sort of settles, though no one has any idea where exactly Taylor's been. Rumors fly around her return, but the most important thing is DJ trying to tell Taylor that Casey was behind the whole scandal. Taylor flips out and, of course, is going to press charges.
While Taylor was away, the drama class (which I'm fairly certain all the Carter girls are in) already had auditions for the rendition of South Pacific. Although Taylor's missed the auditions, the drama teacher allows her to audition for the lead, a role Rhiannon also auditioned for and did rather well at. Rhiannon is cast for the role, but she offers Taylor the role in exchange for Taylor not pressing charges against Casey. Taylor accepts, and everyone agrees that Taylor will keep her word.
After another typical day at school, one of Connor's friends Garrison starts flirting with Casey. DJ hopes to get them together on a double date to a movie with her and Connor, but while they are outside at DJ's car, DJ spots a little boy about to cross the street in oncoming traffic. Being the athletic, speedy Gonzalez that she is, DJ shoves the kid out of the way and is rammed by an SUV. After a visit to the hospital, DJ has broken her right leg and cracked a few ribs. This obviously devastates the athletic crazed DJ and draws quite a bit of local media attention, proclaiming her as a hero.
The newest word at school is that Haley, some girl who was Connor's ex-girlfriend, has moved back into town. While everyone insists that she is sweet and kind, DJ is a bit nervous about where she, Haley, and Connor all stand with one another. In an attempt to speed along her physical therapy/recovery, DJ arranges to do laps at the local pool. While there, DJ realizes that Haley is on the swim team so she practices at the same pool. The two get to talking where Haley admits that she moved on from Connor to another boy in the town she was living in. DJ understands that Haley really is as kind as everyone's been saying, and she even offers DJ rides to the pool.
While DJ is recovering, she's been taking Vicodin to numb the pain. However, DJ starts noticing that her pills are slowly disappearing. After accusing Taylor, and Taylor calmly denying that she has not be dipping into DJ's stash, Taylor confesses that she believes the culprit to be Casey. After DJ confronts Casey, Casey reacts too defensively, sparking an intervention from DJ, Rhiannon, and Taylor. Casey agrees to return DJ's remaining pills and attend a session with a drug counselor.
At the Carter House, Mrs. Carter has set up a fashion show for some unmentioned cause. The girls are all required to model (even "invalid" DJ) in the show and must take lessons at the house on being a professional, elegant model. The show even coincides with homecoming weekend, making it a well-attended event. Mrs. Carter hopes this show will launch Eliza and Taylor's careers into modelling (since that seems to be one of her main reasons for bringing the two into her boarding house program).
More news at school, the votes for homecoming queen are trickling in. Eliza, Taylor, and some snooty girl Madison have all been elected. Taylor decides to run the "do-nothing" campaign, while Eliza enlists Rhiannon and Kriti's help. Everyone is surprised, however, that DJ has been nominated as a write-in, probably because of her heroic act to save the little boy. Additionally, Connor and Haley have been spotted hanging out a bit too intimately - according to Taylor, they were even kissing in the parking lot. This leads DJ to break up with Connor, especially after talking to Haley, revealing that Haley does still like Connor.
It's the night of the homecoming game, and Eliza's parents have flown into town, certain that their daughter is going to snatch the crown. To everyone's surprise (or maybe not) DJ wins! It's mentioned that DJ's mother also held the homecoming queen crown when she attended school at the same high school, and she would be proud of who her daughter has become.
Personal Reflections and Opinions:
To address an earlier comment from a previous blog, Rhiannon has not decided to get back with Bradford. Not to say that she won't, but so far she's not willing to take him back yet. So, phew. Thank you, Lord.
I'm really starting to like Taylor. She makes a lot more sense to me now. She's pretty frank with everything, though sometimes she does hide things about herself, but usually only to make a point. Taylor is honest, which is weird to me. I think that might only seem weird because of how closed off she tends to be; I'm used to the transparent honesty.
Rhiannon's sacrifice for Casey is a smaller scale version of Christ's sacrifice for us. Casey owes Rhiannon like crazy, but Rhiannon's not going to force her to do anything to repay her. Same with Jesus. Jesus took the hit for us and gave up His life when we were the one who deserved it. A nice touch I think. Speaking of Casey, I still really like her too. She does own up to what she did to Taylor, and apparently gets very creative with her public apology. I only wish Carlson had written those specifics down.
Also, I think Taylor was behind the DJ write in campaign. Or maybe I'm giving her too much credit. Taylor is still frozen out by the rest of the girls, but they seem to be drawing together again. Inch by inch. Taylor and DJ have become quite good friends; I just hope this isn't all leading up to some massive betrayal plot twist.
DJ and Connor's relationship is annoying me. They're supposed to be so natural together, like they can talk about anything. But instead of talking, they both end up jumping to conclusions or just cutting each other out. I bet they hook back up in book four. And break up in book five. And so goes the pattern for the rest of the series.
Oh, and since Casey's kind of in a relationship, does that mean Kriti's going to meet someone? She's kind of out of the loop. I hope she does; I really like her, but I'm just not seeing enough of her! Where's her problems? Crushes, family drama, trouble at school? I hardly remember she's made the debate team. At least if she gets a guy, I'll read more about what their deal is. And Eliza too actually. Four girls down, two to read on about I suppose.
That's just about all I can think of for now. May be edited in light of new perspectives and opinions.
Happy Reading and God Bless,
EPD

Love

Pic taken from http://keturahweathers.theworldrace.org/blogphotos/theworldrace/keturahweathers/love1.jpg

I had an epiphany last night, courtesy of the Holy Spirit (i.e. the source of all true and good inspiration). I was going to list the commands I should follow as a Christian and what I should do to show my life is in Christ when the Holy Spirit said, "Write them down. Notice how they all are inspired by love?"

Love is the motivation for all the good we do. Or it should be. When we love the Lord, we love others. We have to. We're no better than anyone else so not loving someone because they are rude or annoying or generally ridiculous means that we consider ourselves above them.

And we're not. We're just as low as they, just as much deserving (or lack thereof) of Christ's love and sacrifice. The only difference is maybe they don't know that the Lord loved them so much He sacrificed His Son to die when we deserved it for all the sins that cover us. They don't know that they don't have to live enslaved to sin; Jesus's blood covers us, washes us white as snow (a bit of a poetic oxymoron). We may be blameless, but so are they.

And if we love others, we show them. We can show them in different ways, maybe through words of encouragement or otherwise gentle demonstrations. But sometimes we have to be tough. That's why when we love each other and love God, we are accountable for all we do. We have to hold others accountable and they have to do the same for us. If we're slipping, we need someone to love us enough to tell us so. Yeah, we'll probably get offended. But in my opinion, if we're offended and defensive, it's because the person telling us we're wrong is right.

Let me reiterate. If we have to give a defense for anything we do, we're not living right. Every action we take should have an obvious motivation and effect that is apparent to everyone around us. Then we have no reason to be defensive or to justify our actions.

I don't know if that made sense. I've thought that for awhile, but it's been hard to put into words. To simplify, if you love everything you do and everyone you're around, your actions will follow what God Almighty asks. When you love you're not jealous, you don't put down, you forgive. When you love, people might say you let others win or use you as a doormat. But they're missing the big picture. You touch lives and confuse others; that confusion leads to search why you're so different. Maybe they ask outright why you're different from everyone else; maybe they intend to trip you up to see if you're just like everyone else.

But when love is your motivation behind everything you do, you can't fail. When you love God, you love others. It's a constant give and get cycle. He loves you, so you pour out your love to others. You love Him, He fills you up to love more and more and more.

I suppose I should amend - when you love the Lord, you can't fail. When you understand that He loves you so much, He died to bring you closer to Him, you can't help but love others. That love motivates every action, and so you follow every command the Lord has in His Word.

I don't know if you're getting this or if I'm jumbling everything up. So, short, sweet, and to the point- Love God, Love Others.

One more thing. Love is not just a feeling; it's an action. Feelings fade and change and tend to be unreliable. If you commit to love, stick to love. There will hard times, but good times too. Keep going. Keep loving. Don't say, "I don't feel loved or like loving anyone today." Do it anyways. Just because you're not up to it is no excuse. Your mother probably didn't love you when she had to change your diapers at 3AM but she kept going, right?

So go. Love God and Love Others.

Now if only I could artistically proclaim this. Usually when the Holy Spirit inspires me, it's during a worship song or something I read and an image comes to mind. Then the symbolism and meaning is fused into the image. Now I have the symbolism and meaning, but no image. Hmm...

Live and Love and God Bless you wherever you go!
EPD

CHG Stealing Bradford Book Review

Preview as Listed on the Back Cover:
{Mix six teenage girls and one '60s fashion icon (retired, of course) in an old Victorian-era boarding home. Add boys and dating, a little high-school angst, and throw in a Kate Spade bag or two...and you've got the Carter House Girls, Melody Carlson's new chick lit series for young adults!}

The Carter House Girls are just getting to know one another when the subject of boys comes up. Rhiannon's dating Bradford, a fellow Christian and the most popular jock in school; Eliza's seeing Harry; and DJ was dating Conner, although now he acts as if he doesn't like her.

Boys aren't always easy to understand, but many girls in the house want a boyfriend - and will do just about anything to get one. So when Taylor decides to put the moves on Bradford, Rhiannon is shocked and hurt. Mistakes are made and feelings battered...there is forgiveness for some and bitterness for others...but at the end of the day, the girls learn a valuable lesson about what it means to be a family.

Ah, yes. So I've just finished the second book, Stealing Bradford, in the CHG Series. If you haven't read the first one, you'll just be confused. I also refer you to my previous review of book one. There's a list of characters there too, so I won't bother repeating that here.

Oh, and spoilers are everywhere! Even in that earlier blog.

The Story:

So the book starts with the girls going to their first day of school. Not much happens other than Taylor embarrassing DJ at lunch as she mentions that Connor is just not that into DJ anymore. Oh, and she does this as Connor and Harry approach the table. So DJ leaves the cafeteria and finds that Casey has backed herself into a corner where three bullies are about the beat her up. DJ saves the day by pretending to call the cops on her cell which scares them away.

DJ and Casey have a bit of a heartfelt talk about how they've both changed and DJ's ready to hear why Casey is so different when she's ready to talk. Before Casey leaves, DJ pulls her into a hug, only to be called a "lesbian dyke" by two popular, mean girls who were nearby.

Drama class, then P.E. where DJ is annoyed to find that Taylor is in her class. The two kind of talk it up, with Taylor trying to figure out why DJ doesn't like her. When DJ points out everything Taylor's done to her, Taylor acts innocent, saying that she was only busting her chops, so to speak. After more of Taylor being inexplicably nice, we skip to DJ at volleyball practice, then just after practice.

Connor flags DJ down to talk to her about everything. Connor is being a typical dumb, prideful guy who can't really admit that he's sorry about what happened between them; he sort of dances around the apology or says it kind of begrudgingly. At any rate, we find out what the heck the problem is between the two of them. Remember the vaguely intense, almost-sex make out scene in book one? Yeah, Connor says he never meant for things to get that crazy, and when DJ says the same, he's surprised; I guess he thought that whole event was mostly her pressuring him, which causing DJ to fly off the handle and ditch him.

Back home, Taylor invites DJ on a joyride on her new lime green Vesper. A cop pulls them over and tells DJ she has to walk home, but he lets them both off with a warning. Conner pulls up next to DJ as she's returning home and the two really get to talking. They patch things up and understand where they both went wrong, then have dinner together.

Upon arriving home, DJ and Mrs. Carter get to talking. Mrs. Carter is considering throwing Casey out of the program because obviously she doesn't want to be there and she doesn't fit in with her grunge punk rock style. Mrs. Carter then calls a group meeting where essentially she tells the girls that they are responsible for one another's attitudes and looks. She leaves, opening up a can of worms for the girls to intervene for Casey's sake. They get to talking and Taylor surprises everyone by mentioning that she understands why Casey is hiding behind the tough girl look - because she's been hurt. Even more surprising, Casey admits to that being true. Casey considers getting her act together, knowing that if she's thrown out of the boarding house, her parents will ship her off to boot camp.

DJ is happy to note the following morning that Casey has thrown out her black hair dye and cut off the blue mohawk and chucked the creepy eyebrow safety pin piercings. Rhiannon even helps Casey figure out her own style by lending her some clothing she's made and redesigned.

DJ invites Connor to the youth group that Rhiannon has invited her to that night. Before they leave, Rhiannon points out several religious books to DJ left in the room from earlier years. Among them are Bibles, one of which belongs to DJ's mother. Rhiannon also hesitantly mentions that Taylor will be joining them for youth that night as per Bradford's invitation.

After the youth service, Connor and DJ notice that Taylor and Bradford are getting along a little too well, and the next day proves true. Bradford has broken up with Rhiannon for Taylor. This enrages DJ, but Rhiannon puts on brave face, despite not wanting to hang anywhere near Taylor. Much to her chagrin, DJ switches rooms with her, leaving herself as an open target to Taylor her new roommate. Eventually, the other girls learn of the Bradford-Taylor news, and Eliza tries to get Bradford and Rhiannon back together.

Eliza's plan happens during First Friday, a monthly art walk that Bradford's mother participates in. Eliza pretties Rhiannon up and they search for Bradford. However, they find him and Taylor "doing it", thus completing crushing Rhiannon. This of course makes the Carter House Girls freeze Taylor out completely, sticking DJ with her just about all the time. But DJ learns quite a bit about Taylor's point of view and tries her best to like her, thanks to a verse she read about "loving your enemies". Taylor claims that the Bradford thing is just as much his fault as it could be hers, and no, they didn't have sex. Taylor's even more familiar with the Bible than DJ is, quoting several verses and showing DJ exactly where they are. As the two room together, Taylor reveals something I'd suspected since book one - her father abused her and her mother enabled him.

Then everything hits the fan. Apparently people at school have found a MySpace page of Taylor's. When DJ and Eliza log on, all of the pictures are smutty porn. Taylor sees this and, to everyone's shock, cries. They aren't her pictures, she says. Which must mean someone else photoshopped them. Talk about payback. Speaking of, several people assume it was Rhiannon, but anyone who knows Rhiannon defends her, saying she's the one who's trying to stop everyone from talking smack about Taylor.

No one's seen Taylor since the incident. The Carter House Girls return home for dinner, finding that Taylor's Vesper is gone too. DJ splits to look for her in town, but comes up with nothing. Finally she tells her grandmother the news, asking her to call Taylor's mother, thinking that Taylor may have been flown back home. But the news only reveals that Taylor's disappeared like this before and she's always come back. Despite many phone calls to Taylor's voicemail, DJ convinces her grandmother to call the police the next morning. The police question each of the Carter girls and mention that the malicious website has been torn down. Casey confesses to the officer that she was the one who created the site and she feels nothing but guilt because of what could have happened to Taylor, despite that the action may put her in juvie.

The girls all gather around at the end of the novel and pray for Taylor's safe return.

The epilogue provides a refreshing break from DJ's point of view into none other than Taylor's. She's shut herself up in a dirty motel room for a couple of days, trying to find the courage to end her life. But instead she remembers the words of her grandmother and prays, "Dear God, if you're there, if you still love me, I need some help. I really, really need some help."

Personal Reflections and Opinions:

Taylor confuses me immensely, though that's a good thing, since that's how the author wants you to feel about her. I knew she was abused because her story and personality just fit so well with that. Especially when she mentions to Casey, "she's been hurt". Prrrrrojectiiiiooooon. Anyways, like DJ, I'm starting to wonder if maybe Taylor is one of those abrasive personalities you just have to get used to. Like, she's really just busting your crops, or she's pushing you to see how strong you are. I think what bothered me the most is I had to be reminded that Bradford was just as much at fault as Taylor.

My reaction was the same as everyone else's, that Taylor stole him away. But really, how stupid is that? Obviously a relationship takes two, so obviously Bradford should have shouldered some blame. I lost sight of that until Taylor brought it up.

Another thing that bothered me was Bradford and Rhiannon are getting back together. What? Rhiannon, you're a good person; you try hard for Christ. But come on! Gentle as lambs, shrewd as vipers. I'm hoping Bradford just said that like it was a plan to put in motion, not like it had been done already.

Speaking of Rhiannon, fantastic character. Even if she is unrealistic, you need that character to reflect who you, the reader, are. I would've been like DJ- upset, distrusting, and bad-mouthing Taylor. Or even Casey, plotting something horrible to get back at her. But Rhiannon wanted all of that to stop; she wanted everyone to move on, and even if she couldn't trust Taylor, she wouldn't bad-mouth her. She even felt bad for saying something Taylor may have interrupted too harshly. However, she did cop out once. When DJ went looking for Taylor, Rhiannon didn't go, using the excuse, "I don't think she'd want me there if you found me." If I was Rhiannon, I would've gone. That would have been a good way to bury the hatchet or at least lay it all out there.

I'm glad DJ is coming to terms with herself. She's realizing who she is but she's finding style too. She even mentions that under the haircut and fancy clothes and makeup, she's the same DJ with the same insecurities and fears - a valid and powerful point. And I love the way DJ prays. She's very real with God and she prays throughout the day, just like I do.

Kriti is a Hindu (they haven't confirmed it, but it seems obvious) but she and Rhiannon are similar moral wise. Kriti didn't bad-mouth Taylor either and she didn't indulge in Taylor's pain through the website fiasco. I'm hoping to see more of her in the series. I'd like to hear more about her religion because if she did become a Christian, it's not like she'd have to change her entire lifestyle; just refocus it onto the Reason behind everything she does.

Will probably edit or revamp this post once the story settles in. I'm thinking the review will make more sense if I'm not writing about the book fresh after setting it down.

Much love and God Bless,
EPD

CHG Mixed Bags Book Review

Preview as Listed on the Back Cover
{Mix six teenage girls and one '60s fashion icon (retired, of course) in an old Victorian-era boarding home. Add boys and dating, a little high-school angst, and throw in a Kate Spade bag or two...and you've got the Carter House Girls, Melody Carlson's new chick lit series for young adults!}
When her mom died, DJ had to move in with her grandmother, internationally famous '60s fashion model Katherine Carter. Now Mrs. Carter's opened a boarding home for young ladies, and DJ -who would rather wear her basketball team uniform than haute couture- is just sure they'll all be unbearable fashion snobs.
One by one, the girls arrive and begin to figure out how to fit into this new family, getting to know each other and forming friendships. There's a few aspiring divas and even a closet Christian. Before long, the Carter House girls are dating, fighting, laughing, shopping, sharing clothes, purses, shoes...and their deepest secrets. DJ may not turn into the perfect little lady her grandmother has in mind, but one thing's for certain - with all these new "sisters", her life will never be the same!
Alright, a friend of mine recommended the series to me and I've read the first one as of, like, two weeks ago. So let's see how well my memory performs. For the record, Melody Carlson is a Christian author, and I've been pining after her TrueColors Series for some time now. So far though this is the closest I've gotten to reading her books. I often go into a Christian series with some wariness as I feel sometimes authors can get high and mighty and start preaching through their characters. But not this series (so far; remember I've only read the first, thus that's the only one I'm reviewing).
As mentioned in the preview, Mrs. Carter is a former supermodel and the epitome of etiquette and grace. She's been trying to pass this onto her granddaughter DJ, but DJ just doesn't care for the "perfect young lady" bit. Then Mrs. Carter opens up her home as a boarding home where six young girls will be trained in proper etiquette, fashions, attitudes, etc. in a classic show of "first impressions mean everything". The girls are required to attend a local high school and must constantly demonstrate good and proper etiquette, whether in the house or in public.
Let's introduce our characters before I recount the story and give my impression.
Characters:
DJ (her real name is Desiree, which she despises but her grandmother insists on calling her by it)is the main character. As noted, she's a tomboy and has no clue about anything fashionable or girly despite her grandmother's attempts at "making her beautiful". She is a great swimmer and does well in most of the sports she plays. She's not really a jock, so she's not all that popular at school, but she's not at the bottom of the social ladder either.
Taylor is the first girl DJ meets as part of the Carter House boarding house program. She's a diva, very fashionable and very snobby. She seems to dislike being enrolled in the program. She smokes, drinks, parties, and generally disregards all of Mrs. Carter's rules, but because of her rich parents' friendship with Mrs. Carter, Mrs. Carter generally favors her and overlooks these things (however, she also ignorant to Taylor's smoking and drinking). Taylor is notable as a man-stealer. She is also jealous of DJ, though it's a bit vague as to why.
Eliza is the next girl to move into the Carter House. Eliza is from the Southern Bible Belt, so she's a "Christian by birth" (i.e. not a Christian at all). While not as snobbish as Taylor, she is still fashionable and considers herself above people like DJ. Eliza is often appalled by DJ's lack of fashion or knowledge of the fashion world (i.e. label brands). She is a bit of a hidden wild child as shown by her drinking, partying, and sex life.

Kriti is an Indian Hindu who has very protective parents. Her father is a quality knock-off purse maker, but that does not diminish her knowledge of the fashion world. Like the other two girls, she is just as fashion conscious, but she is less of a party girl. She does not drink, nor does she party or look down on DJ (at least not as much as the other two). In fact, the two become friends quickly. She is not as vocal as the other girls, but she is not shy either. She and Eliza are rooming together.

Rhiannon used to work for Mrs. Carter to support her mother who had been battling drug addiction. She moved away a few years ago but returned upon Mrs. Carter's request. Because of the work she had done and her potential as a proper, young lady, Mrs. Carter significantly reduced Rhiannon's boarding fee, though they are trying to keep Rhiannon poor, working class life a secret. Rhiannon is a passionate Christian. She claims that before she knew God, she was just like Taylor. She says that her rooming situation with Taylor is perfect just for that reason. Rhiannon is not fashion conscious, but instead she makes her own retro styled clothes. While she is kind and big-hearted, her style does not include her with the fashion diva clique.

Lastly we have Casey. Casey and DJ used to be best friends until Casey moved away a few years back. Now Casey has returned quite different. Classified as punk rock or grunge, Casey now sports piercings in her ears and eyebrows and a black mohawk. She dresses in ripped and torn clothing which obviously singles her out from not only the fashion clique but everyone in the house. She used to be a Christian (i.e. because her parents took her to church) but she was beat up for being one and decided to 180 her life. Outspoken and outraged at the entire plan behind the Carter House program, Casey is stubborn to break rules and stay the way she is. She is rude and callous towards her roommate DJ and everyone else in her path.

The Story (Spoilers Abound):

All six of these girls move in and have a few days to get to know each other before school starts up. Obviously there's already a fashion clique between Taylor, Eliza, and Kriti and the not-so-fashionable clique of DJ, Rhiannon, and Casey. DJ as our main character undergoes a bit of a transformation when Taylor shows interest in DJ's maybe-more-than-a-friend Connor. This inspires DJ to enlist help from Eliza to update her tomboy look with something fashionable that Connor would like. After dying and trimming her hair and Eliza buying her an entire new wardrobe (thanks to Mrs. Carter's credit card), the girls head to the beach with Connor and his friend Harry.

Harry and Taylor bought wine coolers on the way to the beach, which enrages Kriti and she storms away from them, I guess in an attempt to disassociate herself. There's this whole thing where Taylor "accidentally" roots through DJ's new Hermes bag (which actually belongs to Eliza), thinking it was hers, when she pulls out condoms and teases DJ for thinking of using them on Connor. Embarrassed, DJ storms off and meets up with Kriti. Eventually the two head back to the group and DJ decides to go for a swim after telling Taylor off. Connor swims after her and confesses that he likes her as more than a friend. The two kiss and are now boyfriend and girlfriend. Or dating. Or something. I don't remember.

A couple nights later, Connor and DJ and Eliza and Harry go on a double date to the movies, where Connor is being awkward, which makes DJ uncomfortable, and the reader senses that Connor doesn't dig the new "improved" DJ. Later, the group takes a drive and Eliza and Harry leave Connor and DJ alone in the car. After a session of making out, Connor is still bizarrely disinterested in even looking at DJ. The girls return home as Eliza makes a comment about never having sex on the first date. Taylor overhears and reports that DJ and Connor had sex to Mrs. Carter. Mrs. Carter discusses that she doesn't care if DJ does have sex as long as it is done without embarrassing her name.

The girls go to a last day of summer party at Harry's beach house where alcohol and dancing is abundant. DJ spots Connor and Taylor dancing together and tries to confront him, but only ends up being awkwardly passive aggressive before retreating outside to cry in frustration and confusion. Rhiannon meets up with her and explains the void DJ has in her heart is because Jesus isn't there to fill it. By relating their experiences, DJ accepts Rhiannon's offer to accept Jesus into her heart. However, book one ends when DJ meets with Connor again just outside the house. DJ, now having hope through her new found faith, is crushed when Connor tells her "she's changed" and disappears back into the party after a last kiss and a "Bye, DJ".

Personal Reflections and Opinions:

DJ's journey from tomboy to glamorous can be viewed in two lights- she's getting herself together and figuring out who she is and that she is beautiful; or she's changing who she is to impress other people. I find both to be true. As Casey often points out, DJ is "becoming one of them". However, that's not necessarily a bad thing. There's nothing wrong with dressing up and exploring your style as long as you don't change who you are because your changing your style.

There are so many stereotypes that go along with fashions. People like Eliza and Taylor are often considered "looking down their nose" or "having their nose in the air" - i.e. arrogant. But Kriti isn't. She's sweet and kind; she just knows a lot about fashion and cares a great deal for it. While her mindset isn't quite right, she doesn't completely meet the stereotype either.

Casey, despite her talk of being non-conformist, is a conformist. She changed her attitude and so changed the way she looked. While she's not conforming the way DJ is to the fashion clique, she did conform under pressure because she wasn't accepted for who she was.

Rhiannon is hands-down my favorite character. Although there was one incident that I rolled my eyes at (When she meets Casey for the first time, Casey had inked a dragon tattoo on her arm; Rhiannon reacted by telling her the symbolism behind the dragon in Revelation and how is was an evil symbol, etc. I feel that while the dragon may symbolize that, it doesn't have to; anything can be redeemed.), I like the way Melody Carson presented her without making her into a crazy Christian that gives the rest of Christians a bad name.

After the whole scenario with the condemns, I felt DJ overreacted and I stopped reading after that point, thinking that I was going to be stuck reading another over-dramatic character's thoughts. But then I realized that I might have reacted the same way. If I was blindsided like that, I'd be just as flustered. So I guess I was projecting my annoyance with myself onto DJ. Still, I'd like to think I could roll with the punches. "Yep, those are so mine. Yep, you're right I was so going to use them on Connor. So what's for lunch again?"

Mrs. Carter's ideals behind sex are whacked. "You can do it, just don't embarrass me." Ouch. Some grandma. Nothing about protection or STD's (though I think she briefly mentions that), no "Oh snap, we need to have a meeting with everyone. Right now." Nothing. If knowledge is power, you'd think that'd be the best bet to cover your butt in an "embarrassing" situation. And what, if your granddaughter gets pregnant, are you just going to abandon her? Ugh.

The last page of the book flipped me out. When Connor said, "You've changed," DJ thought he meant how she changed from just accepting Christ and she marvelled at how quickly that change showed. But then he sort of dumped her and I thought, "Oh no, now she's going to get bitter with God and not bother staying a Christian." But she didn't. She had the Holy Spirit's peace at that point and she left the situation in God's hands. Which was cool, if a bit unrealistic. I can't imagine not panicking about my boyfriend dumping me if I have no knowledge that the Lord will handle it.

All in all, good book, an easy read, though I fear for Casey and Rhiannon in the next one. The first chapter was included in the back of book one, and it mentioned that Casey had been beat up for her fashion style. Deja vu much, and I'm worried about her now because she must be ridiculously confused. She already changed once; is she thinking she is never good enough? Oh, Casey!

And the second book is called Stealing Bradford. Who is Rhiannon's boyfriend...Fantastic. Why are my favorites being picked on?! Ugh.

Anyways, here's to hoping I'll see you for the next review.
God Bless,
EPD